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Stop This Train

I haven't seen my life in boxes in about two years, so it's very strange to see the plastic totes and reusable bags filled to the brim lined up against the wall waiting to be moved into a U-Haul. I have a feeling that this week is going to be another unofficial dedication to Cleveland because I somehow don't think I'm done talking about it. I feel like I just need to get it all out of my system so I can attempt the process of moving on.

The song "Stop This Train" by good ole John Mayer has been making me cry since 2006, but now I feel like I'm living it truly. It's weird. I want to keep moving forward and get myself to New York, but if I could have made Saturday night, my last night with my friends in Cleveland, last for a week long, I have. Two out of my three roommates are gone, but if I could have paused this weekend, I would've done that in a heartbeat.

I've been going through tons of old pictures from when I lived in the dorms. My hair was longer, my smile was less apparent, and there was never really anyone else in the pictures but me. Slowly as I started getting closer and closer to more recent years, more faces started popping up. It's funny how college was a slow process for me. I didn't immediately love it. I didn't find a group of friends until junior year, but I wouldn't have changed that for the world.

Today after I said goodbye (well, more of a see you later...right now we're both pretending that we're studying abroad next semester. I'm sure we'll cross that bridge when it comes) to one of my roommates, naturally, I cried. My mom asked me if I would've rather given up the last two years with my friends to avoid the tears and of course I said no. As sad as today is, I wouldn't have sacrificed the amazing years I've had in Cleveland and the last two years I've spent with my friends here.

If any of my friends are reading this, I'll see y'all later. I can't wait to see what everyone does with their lives after this day. And now, I must go finish tidying up and crying.

Signing out from Cleveland for the last time...


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